We All Need Community

If the Honeybees can do it ...

Big week here. Lots of loose ends to get to my editor. Later I take a quick trip to NY to stand beside my dearest longtime friend who lost her husband so suddenly. I have so many thoughts and curiosities running through my brain. I can’t wait to see her, yet I know there’s so much ahead for her. This is my most treasured friendship since we were both small children. Grief is a strange phenomenon we all get to experience

As I try to imagine a better world, I believe change begins with ourselves. I believe it happens one person at a time.

Lately, I have been watching our bees and learning more about their remarkable ability to create community, work together for the common good, and function as a team. Honeybee colonies depend upon diversity for survival because each caste of bee performs a specific role. While queens are powerful within their societies, they cannot establish or sustain colonies without the help of drones and worker bees that provide fertilization, food, and wax to build and maintain the hive.

In a world that sometimes feels as though it is on fire, how do we call people into becoming part of the solution? How can we get their attention and their compassion to encourage people to use their voices?

How different would the world be if more people were willing to go a little deeper, have difficult conversations, and open their hearts enough to share their stories?

What if meeting strangers felt more natural? What if we felt connected instead of guarded and afraid?

We continue to hear about, and many of us continue to experience, rising levels of anxiety, stress, depression, and loneliness. Perhaps we were never meant to navigate life entirely alone. Perhaps we need to ask ourselves why we have drifted so far from gathering in the ways earlier generations once did, and many other cultures still do.

Why do so many people seem fearful of community and connection? When did we decide to take individualism to such an extreme? I believe it is long past time for us to begin rebuilding our communities.

We seek community because we benefit from the wisdom and experiences of people on the same path. We need spaces where we can learn healthier ways to navigate personal and professional challenges while continuing to honor our core values and strengthen trust in ourselves.

Community helps us develop supportive habits while releasing the ones that no longer serve us. It gives us opportunities to seek mentoring, coaching, and guidance when we need greater insight, accountability, or encouragement. Through honest conversations and shared experiences, we strengthen our relationships and gain a better understanding of ourselves, our values, and the ways we move through the world.

We also need community because it reminds us of our value. It encourages us to embrace change, flexibility, and our individual strengths while creating meaningful and rewarding bonds in and outside of our work. In healthy communities, vulnerability feels safe rather than dangerous. We become more compassionate, intuitive, empathetic, and open-hearted.

Connection with others can help reduce anxiety and the exhaustion of overthinking, and help us better understand and manage our energy. It can also remind us of our intentions and help hold us accountable to the lives we hope to build.

When we begin embracing a more holistic view of our lives, we start to understand that the way we eat, sleep, think, work, and connect affects everything else.

We really do need each other.

© Susan J. Hilger. All rights reserved.

***Our Story Exchange will meet on Thursday, May 28th to give a few others a chance to join us this month. As always, we will meet at noon EST. Let me know if you need the Zoom link.***

from my book You Belong In This Room